When you know someone is....

As time goes by, we're meeting a lot people. There is this one guy who hooked my attention. An honest, kind, God-fearing and family-oriented guy. We went out on a date. We shared stories with each other. I found him very interesting. He's really a gentleman. The kind of a person that cannot hurt anybody. He opened up everything that happened in his life. You can feel that the person is worth keeping for. The man that you will take care of. BUT.......Everything's still tough for me. I really don't know. Sometimes I will just think that am not lucky in having a relationship, that's why. I want a guy who will never leave me, a guy who will love me with all his life, a guy that will take care of me, a guy who is scared of loosing me, a guy who is faithful, a guy who will never get ashamed of telling the world how much he love me. I admit I became stupid on my previous relationships. I kept fighting for someone who don't deserve it but what will I do? Am inlove. I want to keep that someone. My situation now is different. I need to have more patience and understanding. I have to understand the situation. I have to be more patient about it. I sometimes ask myself, when is my time? When can I be totally happy. I told myself that I will fight for this feeling but this will be the last. If it didn't work, then be it. I won't force myself to someone who doesn't even know how to value a girl that will certainly make him happy. In love, we know that we become blind. When someone better is in your way, you still choose the person who hurt you. Am one of them actually. Well, not everytime someone is getting my attention. Out of 10, only 2. That's me! Why is it like this? When you tell yourself "sya na" you will just have a problem to it. Life is not perfect and is unfair especially in love. How come that your heart will beat for someone? Why not just love your family and friends? I really don't understand it. This time I will give my very best. I promise! But my mom told me that I don't have to focus myself in just one person. Well that's what am doing actually. Maybe because I got tired of crying. There's still some piece of me that knows how to stop when it should stop. All of you get tired, and so do I.

Next time is the last time I'll fall.....

I may not be the perfect partner for that one guy. I may not be his dream girl. I may not be his soulmate. But I promise to be the best partner he could ever have. I can't promise the moon and the stars to him, but I promise to take care of him til the day I die. I'll make sure that everyday is always a special day for both of us. We're all looking for a perfect relationship but do you think you'll have even one? Well, i'd say that there is none. All has its ups and downs but it depends on the couple. If I will be in that situation, I'll make sure that even a single problem will make him smile over it at the end of the day. They say that I am as sweet as a candy, well that's me! My previous relationships were failed. I admit its because of being immature. I've grown up being my dad and mom's baby girl, do you think its easy for me to adjust? That until now am their baby girl? I can be so immature sometimes but i always make sure that it will make someone happy thinking about it.

Inspiration-Aspiration-Family

Dad:

They say that from theinstant he lays eyes on her, a father adores his daughter. Whoever she grows upto be, she is always to him that little girl in pigtails. She makes him feellike Christmas. In exchange, he makes a secret promise not to see the awkwardnessof her teenage years, the mistakes she makes or the secrets she keeps.

Mom:

A mother's love for herchild is like nothing else in the world. It knows no law, no pity. It dares allthings and crushes down remorselessly all that stands in its path.

Sibling:
Brother and sister aretogether as friends. They're ready to face whatever life sends, joy andlaughter or tears and strife. You hold hands tightly as they dance throughlife. 

The astonishing smiles are the greatest gift I could ever receive. I knew from the start that they are really proud of me. Dad is the kind of a person that will shout out to the world "Anak ko yan!" While Mom will just smile but behind those are the heart and mind that jumps. They always say not to follow their foot steps, but those steps were my inspiration to what I became now. The hardships that we went through is a testimony that we can get through everything as being one FAMILY. Support, love and loyalty of a sibling will make you feel strong and brave. I always tell myself not to do bad things, rather to become a role model to them as I am the eldest.

Michelin Star Restaurant Manager in 2 years, F&B Manager in 4 years, F&B Director in 6 years, Hotel Operations Vice President in 8 years, Hotel Operations CEO and President in 10 years time are my goals in life. It is free to dream and we should always remember that the biggest dream are the ones we are scared to do because of failure. Have you thought of dreaming without God's guidance? Well, it will not help you no matter how hard you work. Faith in God is my greatest secret. Despite of all the problems I am encountering, I never loss hope. Because I know that it is only God's test (Mathematics exam in my interpretation) to check until where I can fight against those battles. I believe that the reason behind this success is a heart and soul that is being surrendered to God. He never fail to give me what I asked for. I may not be a church goer anymore but I never forget to talk to Him and thank Him for everything I have now and for a blessing of a family.

When my father died, I realized a lot of things. "Kapag may nawala, may mas magandang kapalit" as what the saying goes. I never have thought that it was my Dad that will take away from me. I once questioned God why my Father, suddenly I realized that I should have not done it. I don't have the right in fact it is His will and I have to accept it whether I like it or not. Dad appeared in my dream, he told me this "Wag ka umiyak anak, hindi naman nawala si Daddy eh nandito lang ako." And so I decided to start pursuing my dreams as it is my father's wish as well as my mom. 

I was lucky to have been hired in Makati Shangri-La. I was one of the 200 people who done the interview but we were only 15 who passed. It was really a blessing for me. I told myself that it was the start of my journey. Some people say 5 star hotel doesn't accept undergraduate but I proved them wrong. It is a matter of showing off your personality and eagerness to be part of the company that can help them grow more. I worked hard for the short time i spent with my Conway's Family. I stopped working when Dad died and study again. A lot of opportunities came but i put it on hold as I was still young that time. Those chances were gone. 2012 came  and had an offer again, i grabbed the chance. I had an offer letter from Shangri-La Dubai, Park Hyatt Abu Dhabi and Atlantis The Palm. Mom asked me which one I am going to accept. 

Atlantis The Palm gave me the opportunity to grow and proved all the students that even if you didn't graduate, there is still chance in pursuing their dreams. It was very hard at first knowing that your family is miles away from you. But I have to be strong and brave. I am doing this not only for myself, but for the bright future of my family. There is no age limit if you still want to continue your studies. And I promise myself that I will finish College. At least this time, I don't really have to worry about everything because I have saved enough. Once being on rags is enough. Don't limit yourself in dreaming, have faith in God and always thank your Parents.

Career vs Lovelife

I'm gonna give the definition of love and career in a positive and negative state.

POSITIVE:

Career - An occupation undertaken for a significant period of a person's life and with opportunities for progress.

Love - An intense feeling of deep affection

NEGATIVE:

Career -Can be the reason of break-up.

Love - is the biggest mistake you’ve felt to a person that is not DESERVING. A WASTE OF TIME and A WASTE OF EFFORT

People says, "pag swerte ka sa career, malas ka sa love life." I am starting to believe that saying. Well, even before. I noticed that when God blessed me with a good job, I do not have love life or rather, it turns out into being hopeless. Is it because I cannot manage the time? Or I am just being a parapsychotic person?

We can elect to have both a career and a relationship, but it’s never easy. It comes down to how hard you are willing to fight for both or one over the other. As careers advance, promotions become available that may have a negative impact on your relationship. Some people have the ability to balance both fluidly, but many cannot.

True love is difficult to come across, which is why many people are willing to lose their career for it. When deciding whether or not to give up your career, you need to look at a variety of aspects. Could you ever forgive yourself for passing up an amazing opportunity for the benefit of someone else? Will you resent your partner eventually?

This is a huge issue because resentment breeds tension that will only cause arguments. Bitterness is a slow killer of relationships and if you ever regret giving up your career, this can turn into hatred.

“Some women choose to follow men and some women choose to follow their dreams. If you’re wondering which way to go, remember that your career will never wake up and tell you that it doesn’t love you anymore”- Lady Gaga

Everything in the world is worthless until we attach our hearts to it. When deciding whether to give up your career you need to look at what is important to you. If your heart and soul lie within your career, stick with it, but if your heart is in your relationship then that’s the route you need to take. As long as you pick the option that is meaningful to you, you will not regret it.

Giving up a career to raise a family is a huge issue many women face, but in today’s society it’s possible and acceptable for women to have both a career and a family. The choice isn’t about having a successful career or a family, it’s about what will make you happy.

Careers are incredibly beneficial to our mental health if they are in an industry you truly care about. No person should ever ask you to give something up that you love. Constantly improving and growing, as a professional, provides endless amounts of self-esteem. If you are sacrificing something you truly love regardless if it’s your partner or your dream job, you are giving up a part of yourself. You need to ask yourself why are you choosing and who is making you choose.

I would never do something that I was told to do by anyone. You worked hard in life to earn a career so you deserve to reap the rewards. Your significant other should not be preventing you from doing so, instead they should respect your ambitions and encourage you every step of the way. I am all for compromising and discussing things, but ultimatums are an absolute no-no. In all honesty, is it ever worth giving up a career for someone that can betray you?

For some reason some people don’t realize the truth is that you can have it all. You can have an amazing career complemented by an equally amazing partner. Your career is an aspect of your life that will help you gain autonomy, self-sufficiency and the lifestyle you have always envisioned. Your relationship will provide you with emotional, warm and loving support. The person you are with should be there to encourage you and help you to be the best person you can.

Why would you even want to be with someone who does not want to push and motivate you? I have always believed that in order to be happy in a relationship you need to be happy with yourself first. How can you ever be truly happy knowing you sacrificed your career for a guy or girl?

Dubai

I've never planned of working out of my country. I just tried to apply but just a front cause someone pushed me to do it. Til one day i realized that i really need to live independently. There was a lot of negative thoughts came onto my mind. Like, "i cannot live without my family for sure i will just come back", etc. I remember when i was inside my room, i was reminiscing. It flashed back all the bad things that happened to us. There was this guy who approached me when i was on duty in Shangri-La. He asked me how long i've been working there. I said i am just new there. He took out his wallet and gave me the business card. He is the General Manager of Park Hyatt Abu Dhabi. I tried to pass my CV and after 1 week, i got a call from Hyatt. I will be having a skype interview the next day. After the interview, they called up again and said that they will send my contract as soon as possible. I asked how much would be my salary. I had second thought when i heard the answer. The first thing that came to my mind was, i don't think it will not help my family, it is not enough. I refused the offer. Another unidentified call shocked me again. I thought that it was Hyatt, but no. Shangri-La Abu Dhabi. Same thing happened and same offer. Two down. My friend asked me if i want to apply abroad. He doesn't know that i applied twice already. My answer was yes. He gave me the address of his agency. I came there with my mom and passed my CV again. I did the initial interview and i luckily passed it. They said that a big hotel is hiring, the name is Atlantis The Palm. I searched it on the internet and i was so amazed when i saw it. I got so excited. The agency called up that i would be having a final interview in Giles Hotel Makati. Wasn't able to attend on the screening because i was late. I received a call from the agency late afternoon so i needed to travel more that an hour just to get there. They told me what excuse should i tell to the interviewer. It was Ms. Benet. I was so scared when i saw here. I don't know how will i answer to her properly and formally. On the on-going interview, she just asked me what is initiative for me. I answered her straight away. Kalas! Ms. Dina checked the comment of Ms. Benet to me. It was "very beautiful." What a flattering comment i said. After 1 week i received a call again. I passed the interview and just have to wait for my offer letter. Ms. Benet called me and said to prepare what papers i needed. I told my boyfriend about it. I saw the sadness on his eyes. Tried to convince him that i really need it for my family and for myself as well. I want to grow and be independent. All my life i always call my mom and dad if i cannot do this, cannot do that. He just said that if it will make me happy then go. He will not stop me. I had one month preparation. While the time flew, i felt like not working in Dubai. It scared me a lot. October 27 2012 came fast. My family and my boyfriend dropped me at the airport. I didnt cry coz i wanted them to see me strong. I just cried when i was already inside the plane when i've read the sms. I told myself, "this is it. never say NO."

Welcome Dubai. I thought that it would be a hard adjustment for me but it was not. I am the hostess in Rostang The French Brasserie. I met a lot of people with different nationality. I was scared at first til i get used to it. I didn't even think of going out when i was still new here. I met a trust worthy people and started to go out. Everything is so easy now. It is easier for me to deal with tough situations because i proved to myself that i am brave and strong. For 4 months in Dubai, i already experienced everything. Give you some issues, gossip about me, play with me, etc.

Thank you Dubai for teaching me more lessons that i really needed. Looking forward for more years that i would be staying here.

The Road To Recovery

   It is certainly not the severity of our problems that determines whether or not a woman will recover. Before recovery, women who love too much are very much alike in character, regardless of the specific details of any present circumstances or past histories. But a woman who has overcome her pattern of loving too much is profoundly different from who and what she was prior to recovery.
  Perhaps, until now, it was luck or fate that has determined which of these women would find her way and which wouldn't. However, it has been that all women who do recover have eventually taken certain steps in order to do so. Through trial and error, and often without guidelines, they nevertheless, again and again, ultimately followed the program of recovery.
   The steps are simple, but not easy. They are all equally important and are listed in the most chronologically typical order.

• Go for help
• Make your own recovery the first priority in your life.
• Find a support group of peers who understand.
• Develop your spiritual side through daily practice.
• Stop managing and controlling others.
• Learn to not get "hooked" into the games.
• Courageously face your own problems and shortcomings.
• Cultivate whatever needs to be developed in yourself.
• Become "selfish"
• Share with other what you have experienced and learned.

Having received little real nurturing yourself, you try to fill this unmet need vicariously by becoming a care-giver, especially to men who appear in some way needy

     Think about how children, especially little girls, behave when they are lacking the love and attention they want and need. While little boy may become angry and act out with destructive behavior and fighting, more often a little girl will turn her attention to a favorite doll. Rocking and soothing it, and at some level identifying with it, that little girl is engaged in a runabout effort to receive the nurturing she needs. As adults, women who love too much do the same thing, perhaps only slightly more subtly. In general, we become care-giver in most, if not all, areas of our lives. Women from dysfunctional homes (and especially, I have observed, from alcoholic homes) are over represented in the helping professions, working as nurses, counselors, therapists, and social workers. We are drawn to those who are needy, compassionately identifying with their pain and seeking for relieve it in order to ameliorate our own. That the men who attract us most strongly are those who appear to be needy makes sense if we understand that it is our own wish to be loved and helped that is at the root of the attraction.
   A man who appeals to us need not necessarily be penniless or in ill health. Perhaps he is unable to relate well to others, or is cold and unaffectionate, or stubborn or selfish, or sulking or melancholy. Maybe he is a bit wild and irresponsible, or unable to make a commitment or be faithful. Or maybe he tells us he has never been able to love anyone. Depending on our own background, we will respond to different varieties of neediness. But respond we will, with the conviction, and our wisdom in order to improve his life.